Eye Tests Have Changed A Lot Since I Was Wee.

It used to be that I’d dread getting my eyes tested. This was because I knew I couldn’t see properly and I knew that the optician would probably notice this and I’d have to wear stupid glasses for the rest of my life. It’s tough being 6.

To stop this from happening, I’d try to memorise as much of the eye chart as possible on my way in to the room because it was pinned up right by the door. It worked for a wee while but soon I was rumbled and that was me prescribed glasses.

I remember the optician saying “You have astigmatism. That means that one of your eyes is shaped like a rugby ball instead of a football, young man. Do you like football?”. I hated that guy. And then he said, “Wear these glasses when you’re at school and when you’re reading and you probably won’t even need them at all as an adult.”

I threw them in a hedge a few days later.

I need to wear glasses all the time now. I cannae see for shit and looking at the sky on an overcast day is torture even with tints.

I went for an eye test yesterday and was amazed at the technological advances even though it’s only been two years since I was last checked.

When they shone light into my eyes I saw blood going through my blood vessels in my eyes. I’d never seen that before. It was like tripping. I told the optician, “I wish I had a photo of what I can see right now.”

It was impossible to get a photo of what I was seeing, of course. However, I did get the two pictures they took of my eyeballs.

Here they are here >>>